It’s a new chapter. #4, my baby, the youngest, that eternal 4 year old in overalls and playing with a Tonka truck…has his driver’s license. And is off, driving himself to school, to the library for studying (pretty college girls), to the store for Cold Remedies in the form of salt-and-vinegar potato chips. Fabulous on a sore throat, really.
I’m not quite sure how to take it yet. With the other boys, there was a younger one in the wings, so the transition wasn’t quite as dramatic. Unlike the older ones, this one is taking it as a Sign of Manhood, and is (for the time being) acting like A Man. He blew himself out of bed at 5:30, even though for the last 10-1/2 years I have been dragging him out at 6:00. He had breakfast and was out of the door by 7:45, even though for the last 5 years I have been bellowing at him every day at 8:00 to HURRY UP YOU’RE GOING TO BE LATE.” His reason for leaving was that he wanted to avoid the Rush 10 Minutes…it’s a small town and traffic is pretty dense from 7:55 to 8:05. He said the other evening that he was feeling adultish, because he could make his own decisions about when and where. His only stipulation (for now) is that he sends a text letting me know he got there. Soon a curfew will have to be set, and that’s ok too. But, he is an early-to-bed type except on the weekends, and his friends aren’t heathens, and also have curfews, so I am not stressing overmuch.
I have a test to take today. It’s the Compass exam for college admissions. Mind you, I am not applying to Harvard or anything, it’s a local community college, but nonetheless, there is an exam to take which involves math that I haven’t used for 32 years. However, a mnemonic that #2 and #4 reminding me of will help: Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally…the order of operations for algebra. I can do this. Nerves are not an issue….test anxiety isn’t something I’ve ever had. However, I was up off and on all night, due to a head cold that caused egregious snoring, so bad it woke up both the dog and me…he’d bark. Pretty bad. Thankfully God invented coffee and gave Mankind the knowledge of how to fix it, and also travel mugs. If the people at the college say anything about it I will pull both The Widow Card,and The I’m Older Than You Don’t Futz With Me Card.
Himself would be proud. He said he’d fully support any move toward school, since I dropped out to support him so he could finish his degree. When we were discussing life insurance 15 years ago, I asked that he get enough to put me through school and support the family so I wouldn’t have to work while doing so. And here I am, in that situation. I fall back on the New Motto for my life “It is what it is.” I wish the circumstances weren’t so, that I was going to school because I wanted to, not because I needed to, but it is what it is and I am thankful for the foresight to make it possible.
Currently the plan is to study business administration, with the goal of an associates degree, and work as an admin assistant after I move to Alabama. Subject to change, as there are Options available. However, before any of that can happen, I have to actually get accepted, prove that I am capable of doing the work, pass this upcoming test. I hope they let me bring in a pad of paper, because those “calculator” things are beyond my capabilities right now, and scratch paper is much easier to deal with.