Today it is a bold and sunny day, the kind that makes people say things like “THIS is why I live in the South!” A friend texted me earlier and said “I’ll pick you up at 10:10”, not leaving any option of backing out, and requiring me to commit acts of personal hygiene and put on clothes.
One does not necessarily feel like bathing during grief. It seems kind of pointless even. Like who’s going to notice that really matters? I have, however, tried to maintain a regular schedule and put on deodorant and even shaved the pits a couple of times. Go me.
Anyway, she took me to a brunch at the church. Menfolk cooked tasty things and cut up fruit and served coffee while ladyfolk chatted and ate and listened to a couple of missionary ladies talk about Peru. It was nice, and only a couple of people touched me. One did it because she knew I didn’t want her to. Which was fine because I really had no idea what was going on anyway. Widow Brain and all that. And something about Peru.
#4 and I went to the local Feed and Seed and bought seed potatoes. To think I was going to order them at $10 a pound. Seriously. I bought 2 pounds, 1 of red taters and 1 of gold, and it came to 94 cents. That’s right. Less than a dollar and that included tax. I noticed a lot of other seeds, the kind I plant, to buy per pound which is awesome because I don’t want a pack of 100 pea seeds, I want 20 seeds. Period. Which would come out to like 12 cents instead of the $3 per pack. Now that I am a Widow On A Fixed Income (for the time being), I have to watch pennies, and seeing all that at the feed and seed made me very happy.
Then we went into the garden and planted snow peas and another row of lettuces. It’s a little late getting the snow peas in but it has been unusually cold. The english peas are up! pretty little sprouts about an inch high! I am pleased. Gardening makes me optimistic, and Himself had such delight in building that garden for me, he took a great deal of pleasure in spoiling me with stuff he knew I wanted, like gardens and convertibles and such. Being treasured like that is something I will carry with me forever. It was nice to get out there with #4 as well, just digging and watering and moving things around.
Maybe it’s getting out in the sun and fresh air that is helping, but I am feeling a bit better this afternoon. This morning was kind of rough, anger and fatigue combined to make a foul mood, but some time with friends and a men-made meal, then poking stuff in dirt turned it around. I can hear Himself “It’s too nice of a day to sit inside!” He would want to go shoot at things, but I can’t really do that without him, due to the range being on plant property and all. It’s ok. It will come.
Now I am going to go watch documentaries and eat cheetoes. Because I can.