Aging Gracefully, or, God’s Consolation Prizes

There are parts of getting old(er) that I am not so fond of. Heartburn/reflux whenever eating something more interesting than a bowl of cornflakes (but there’s a pill for that!), aches and pains in assorted joints (Ditto!), the difficulty of bending over to reach my toes so I can paint the nails (no pill for that but there are people who will do it for me…for a fee, of course). Painted toes are important in the Summer, and it is the one medium I have for getting as funky as I want to.

Have you noticed that? We Women Of A Certain Age can express our inner girl-ness through the colors on our toes. Right now mine are a metameric purple-blue, like the paint on a hot rod. Last week they were glittery hot pink.  I see my friends, all relatively conservatively dressed women similar to myself, with aqua blue, or dark navy-almost-black, or little white daisies on their toes.

Anyway, this aging thing. it’s not so bad.  God has provided (what I consider to be) Consolation Prizes.  For instance, along with the…ahem….”softness” of middle age (can be translated into “cannot be bothered to go to the gym but maybe will one day”) has come…well…er. bigger boobs.  As a younger woman I yearned for them. When I had babies they went up a cup size, which was great fun, then they went away. Around the time I turned 45 or so…there they were! Well HELLO THAR! A professional fitting revealed that I had the ones I always wanted, finally!   It is as if God was saying “Here, have this because of stretch marks.”

Then my hair got curly. I imagined Him saying “ok, yes, you’re getting grey, so I’m going to give you curly as well.” As a younger person, the hair was stick straight and wouldn’t hold a curl to save my life. even an expensive professionally done perm was only pretty for a couple of weeks, then turned into limp little sad frizzy things. EVEN with the expensive salon curl-revitalizing angel-spit hair serum.  I flamin’ love the curls.  A friend, who’s a hair professional person, FINALLY explained (no one else ever had!) that hormonal changes inherent in peri- and menopause can cause curliness. Is that another one of God’s Consolation Prizes? Like “Ok, hon, you’re having hot flashes, here, have those curls you always wanted.”

Oh sure, there’s things I could be complaining about, like how the men my age seem to have aged better than many of the women…I see a few of them on Facebook, and remember them as kind of gawky, all elbows and adam’s apples but now they’re…well..anyway.  Terry was lean and all legs and arms when we married humptwenty years ago, and like all men seem to,has aged with grace and dignity and has those silver bits on his temples and crinkly things around his eyes and the occasional interesting scar-with-a-story-behind-it.

I say, don’t fight to stay young, Find the benefits of age and roll with them. If you’re still alive, you’re probably a better driver. You have more experience in most everything. You’ve learned to appreciate the simple pleasures of a cup of coffee and a pastry without fear of what it will do to the fit of your skinny jeans.  You appreciate the comedy of the 1960’s and ’70’s.

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About rootietoot

I do what I can.
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8 Responses to Aging Gracefully, or, God’s Consolation Prizes

  1. Barbara says:

    I adore the fact that I can be as friendly as I want to be to total strangers and nobody takes it as my “coming on to them”. I’m not the hot chick anymore, just everybody’s mother. Very very liberating!

  2. Michelle says:

    So true! Plus I can dispense advice on all things sundry and the young ones actually listen for a minute or two before rolling their eyes, lol. I’d like to donate my belly flab to someone tho. Any takers?

  3. Bella Rum says:

    My favorite part of aging is leaving my period behind. That’s worth a few wrinkles.

    I loved the video. That was my favorite CB skit, too. That show was so well written and performed.

  4. Gorgeous skit!

    I often get the “how to look 25 when you are over the hill” ads on facebook and such and they just have NO IDEA how much I am enjoying just the living and have more love and a far happier life now – why would I trade it?

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