In spite of the worlds best efforts, in spite of cheery commercials that tell me if I give/get expensive electronics and sparkly jewelry I will be showing/receiving proper love to my family, in spite of a massive stack of catalogs arriving daily in the mail that exhort me to purchase woodstoves/goats/free trade pistachios that benefit less fortunate people…I ain’t feelin’ it much.
Everyone else in the house is respecting that, bless their hearts. I love them for their sensitivity to my mercurial moods. Terry and the boys climbed into the attic yesterday and got down the boxes of Christmas decorations. I poked at them in a desultory manner and grumbled at the strings of lights that wouldn’t light up. Upon finding a string that DID light, Terry cheerfully went to Walmart and purchased a step stool and those Command stick on hooks, to make it easier to hang them. I have a rather contemporary kitchen, and like to hang a string of colored lights across the top of the cabinets. So that got done. I felt slightly more cheerful.
Then dug through the box of Santa mugs. I started collecting them 25 years ago,when I discovered they are usually very cheap, they’re cheerful and festive and Christmasy. The thinkng was “this is very cheap, festive, and Christmasy. It will give the boys something they can both give me, and can use for their morning hot chocolate,and being a little bit silly, the mugs are…y’know…cheap, festive,and Christmasy.” Every year I get at least one, unless they come across another one that they like. This year I got 3, because Eli spied a very silly one that looks like Santa doing a handstand.
So there’s That. I am drinking the morning coffee out of a Santa mug, in another attempt to jump start the mood.
I guess the problem is that there’s the STUFF going on at Terry’s job. STUFF I can’t really talk about, but there is a huge amount of uncertainty and that is squashing the ability to cut loose and enjoy the holidays at the moment. NO, he’s not at risk of losing his job (Thank God!) but…well. Uncertainty. A resolution would make it a lot easier to relax.
In the mean time I am muddling through on autopilot. Fortunately there’s 26 years of Christmases to call on, so I know what to do, which noises to make, how to comment on other people’s festive decorations.
You know what else would help? Maybe a bit of Winter weather! It got up to 78 yesterday. Open window and ceiling fan temperatures. Ridiculous. How am I supposed to wear an ugly Christmas sweater when it’s t-shirt temps?