The best part of waking up

coffee people, no…let me rearrange that. Coffee, people. (that’s better) That’s where it’s at. I have to have my coffee.  Have to. Sometimes 2 cups in the morning is fine, but not today. 3 cups in and I am still feeling the need for it.

Last night’s dreams involved things like huge rolls of folding money and pouncing elephants, that bounced like puppies into the bank lobby. One elephant scratched his back on the top of the door, poor thing. He was ok, and seemed not to notice. I guess they really do have thick skin, even in dreams.  I was tired when I woke up. Carrying enormous rolls of money whilst riding a bouncing elephant is hard work.

Also, my idea of a cup of coffee isn’t the same as the 3 doctors who said “you drink too much, keep it to one in the morning and one in the afternoon.  It’s not the polite cups held by the women in these images. It’s more like the vat-mug held by the man in the first one. Y’know…as big as my head almost.  I also look more like him than them…bags under the eyes and a nearly sexual satisfaction with the first deeply drawn aromatic breath of it’s rich and reviving aroma.

Oh sure, when I’ve had the (well ok…1 of my cups equals about 3 of the doctor’s cups) more-than-recommended dose, the tender and dainty kidneys start working overtime and I’m doing the middle-aged-woman-who’s-had-a-bunch-of-kids dance to the bathroom, I wonder about the wisdom of drinking a known stimulant and diuretic in such large quantities, but then decide that drinking a glass of water with each cup (ok 3 cups, but it’s a BIG glass of water) will balance that all out and render the whole thing physiologically neutral. Because I am good that way. Like fried chicken on a salad makes it nutritionally neutral.  Just eat more salad so you can have more fried chicken. Amirite? Can I get an “AMEN”?



So today, because I want to be alert, I am working now on the second third pot. Yes. I said second third pot. The first one was shared amongst 4…no…5 of us. 12 cups between 5 people isn’t enough, especially when I’m one of them. So a second pot was made and that was shared amongst 3 of us, because the other 2 went to work and school. And yet, I am still feeling fuzzy. Also, the 6th one is being heard to make wakey-up noises and will want some. (here he comes now). He shares my need for the morning caffeine. So the other one still here was coerced into making a 3rd pot. Bless his heart.  And now, after I go to the Ladies Room, and drink a glass of water, I’ll have another cup.


Oooo…mah FAVORITE!

Mmmm. delicious.  I like my coffee with a little bit of sugar (maybe 1/2 teaspoon to a 16 ounce mug) and a splash of milk.  If  it’s black because we are tragically out of milk, it will have more sugar in it. Also…strong. Strong coffee. Cowboy coffee. That is, strong enough to float a horseshoe in it.  I am pretty sure there are some sort of health benefits to strong coffee-phytowhatzits or maybe help with the ADD or something. All I know is that when I have coffee I don’t feel like committing acts of mayhem.

How do you like your coffee?


About rootietoot

I do what I can.
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6 Responses to The best part of waking up

  1. FringeGirl says:

    I drink decaf, although that my be sacrilege around these parts. 3 pots? Your might be more addicted to coffee than my husband. And, that’s saying something. 😉

    I have a sign in my kitchen that says “Drink Coffee! You can sleep when you’re dead.”

    Here’s to waking up! *coffee cups clink*

  2. Steve says:

    coffee is nasty and bleh

  3. pheenobarbidoll says:

    The only time I like coffee is when it’s a super cold evening and I have some Baileys in it.

  4. Stone Fox says:

    i like my coffee frilly; with chocolate powder (or syrup, i’m not picky) and milk or cream. a mocha, if you will. or mooka, as one of my shiny new aussie friends called it because she only drinks tea and turns her nose up at spending ridiculous amounts of money on fancy coffee.

  5. Attilathemom says:

    I love it strong enough to bend a spoon, with a lot of real cream. Unfortunately, I’m only allowed one cup a day (why take meds to slow your heart down and then speed it up with caffeine?) so I want it to be a good one!!

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