So, the biggest resolution I made is to worry less about stuff i cannot control. Boy that’s a tough one. I am a chronic and habitual worrier, and when I am not actively fretting about something definite, my mind kicks in and starts fretting in the background. However, I am determined to do this resolution. Just this morning, about 4:30am, I woke up in a panic about money. and not even “oh Lordy can we pay our bills this month” but “Oh NO! What if #4 doesn’t get a scholarship when he graduates from High School?!”…he’s in 7th grade. Then that spiraled into “what about WORK? WHAT will he do for WORK?!” He’s 12. Then I thought “Good grief, Rootie, you’re a moron. An eedjit.” but I still laid there and fretted about the distant future.
Stupid brain. If it can’t find something relatively concrete to fret over, it will make something up.
Not long ago I was all fretful and blaming myself for all sorts of problems with my kids, and the troubles they’re having (which in the grand scheme of things aren’t that big) and the sarcasm cortex (located just beneath the logic lobe) started firing and saying “That’s right! You’re to blame for all their problems AND you’re ALSO to blame for the equality issues women have in Saudi Arabia! It is ULTIMATELY YOUR FAULT WOMEN CAN’T DRIVE IN THE SAUDI KINGDOM!” That was when I said…ah. Ok. I get your point.
So now, when I start fretting about stuff, I say to myself “Self, it’s your fault women can’t drive in Saudi Arabia, too.” and that is like that rubber band people wear when they want to stop smoking, and snaps me back into reality.