I’m standing on home base, knees bent, squinting at the pitcher, bat waving a little over my shoulder…will I knock it out of the park? Or bunt and dribble a sad little bouncing ball toward 3rd base, or will the ball go whiffing by my head to the tune of an umpire shouting “STEEEEERIKE!” WHO KNOWS??

Ok no more baseball analogies.

Christmas is a-comin’! RAAAAHT OVER THAR! You can’t even say it’s just over the horizon because now it’s turned onto our street and we can see it coming!

I think I’m ready…still need to get a gift for Terry’s mom…I know what I’m going to get, just have to go and get it.

I was in the grocery store before 7am. If it’s a choice between dealing with floor-sweeping young men or cranky women with cranky children, I’ll take the young men, thanks.

Food is all bought, it just needs to be prepared. Low fat cream cheese for dips and a cheese ball. Velveeta and sausage as per Terry’s request. Bell peppers, cucumbers and carrots in an attempt to stave off the inevitable heart attack from the velveeta and sausage. Apples and oranges, tortillas to make crackers (cheaper, lower fat, and tastier). Chickpeas for hummus, because it’s WEIRD and I want to give Terry’s mother something to call WEIRD…it’s called manipulation. If you fix something you know is WEIRD, then you’re controlling what that person thinks….HAHAHAHAHA….

Oo I found tasty recipes for a sundried tomato and pesto dip, gonna make garlic chips for that, and an easy-peasy cheeseball that’s just cream cheese, cheddar cheese, and a pack of Ranch dressing powder, then roll it in nuts…I like easy, I like Ranch. The velveeta and sausage is more complicated…you cook the sausage, mix it with melted velveeta…that’s it. Terry’s going to hunt up a small crock pot, we’ve been wanting one anyway. If he can’t find it I’ll do the double boiler thing. I’ll put recipes up at Rootie’s Kitchen
See, I don’t DO Christmas Dinner. When you have a houseful of Heathens, who wants to spend 4 hours cooking a big meal? NOT ME! So Christmas Eve will have a nice meal after church. 2 fat hens smoked with oranges and ginger, a WEIRD rice blend, and turnip greens provided by Terry’s mother. I don’t cook turnips and she knows Terry loves them, soshe’s bringing them. i suppose if I loved Terry more, like a proper wife, I’d fix them frequently…but there are limits, I reckon.

Anyway, I’m as ready as I’m going to be. The guest room needs sprucing up and fresh sheets. Air mattresses need inflating, because the older boys announced that they WOULD be spending Christmas Eve night here. Last year they were all Adult and stuff, and said they’d be over sometime Christmas morning, and dragged in about 9am, only to discover that we’d already opened gifts and had sweet rolls…apparently they though we were going to wait on them or something…so this year, they want to Be Here. And since I converted their old bedrooms to something else about 5 minutes after they moved out, they’ll get air mattresses on the floor.

Are you ready? What do you still have to do?

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About rootietoot

I do what I can.
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8 Responses to

  1. Jo says:

    I have to wrap a bunch of presents and buy something for my mother.

    Why is hummus weird? I thought it was a pretty mainstream food these days. I’d be lost without it.

    • rootietoot says:

      “I thought it was a pretty mainstream food these days.”

      Well, you’re in Southern California,they’re in North Alabama. It’s WEIRD.
      Mind you, I love the stuff and have it regularly, but I’m in South Georgia and enjoy the cosmopolitan influence of Savannah.

  2. Jo says:

    Actually, I’m in Toronto, Ontario (Canada), but yes, your point still stands.

  3. JerseyChick says:

    Someone who obviously shares my oldest daughter’s good decorating taste gave me a string of white lights this year, so my remaining duty is to hang them around the livingroom window and further highlight the manger scene.
    I am eternally thankful for talented friends who have rendered cooking unnecessary for a couple of days at least, too.
    Yeah, we’re as ready as we’re gonna be. Even without any hummus in the house.

  4. Bella Rum says:

    The house is as clean as it’s going to get, and the gifts are wrapped. I still have all the cooking to do. I’m starting that this morning. We will be having hummus. We love it. Hope you and Terry and the boys have a very Merry Christmas, Rootie.

    Bella

  5. Fortunately, I’m good to go and don’t have to cook a big meal. All I need to do is bake about a million cookies which I’ll do tomorrow. BUt while I’m baking I’ll be thinking about your Velveeta and sausage! That sounds like my kind of treat πŸ™‚

    Hope you all have a fabulous time and that you get lots of help in the kitchen cleaning up. WIshing you and yours a fantastic Christmas and a happy and healthy 2011. xo jj

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