Because it really is personal…

Med changes are scary. There’s never a good time to do it, because even when you’re changing stuff up, life marches on. There’s no time for considering scary side effects, or bad reactions or any of that stuff. I can’t consider it, because even if I’m going all crackly from a bad prozac reaction (remind me to tell you about that some day), the laundry and cooking still needs to be done, and people still get mad at you if you snap at them because it feels like bugs are under your skin or your brain is turning to bubble-wrap.

No, right now I’m not having a bad reaction, I don’t think, anyway. I’m whatchacallit- hypomanic. I can tell, it feels different from the increased activity level of, say, drinking a Red Bull. Stuff bugs me. I see a pile, a perfectly normal pile which ordinarily is quite ignorable, and it screeches at me until I do something about it. I stand at the fridge and stare inside, unable to decide what to eat, so I drink some water and move on.

Hypomania is a great diet plan- increased activity with decreased caloric intake= skinny-making. ‘Cept that it only lasts a few days, then I’m starving and can eat half a cow with cheese on top.

So, I’ve dealt with 2 piles already, and the herb garden is overrun with oxalis so I’m listening to it whine at me about that.

#2 is finished with school so I’m listening to him thump around upstairs and I’m recalling the mess his room is in and thinking I’ll clean it up as well. I don’t know why, just will.

So many things to do, so much is speaking to me. A photo album to put together, Walter’s letters to scan to disc, 95 years worth of snapshots from my grandparents’ lives to scan and archive on disc. And if I don’t do it all RIGHT NOW I’ll…something…bust a gut and make a mess all over the floor then THAT will have to be cleaned up.

Oh and another thing…Dad got a USB turntable to convert vinyl records to CD’s. but doesn’t feel like doing it, so he gave it to me, along with his album collection and mine, need to be converted. Including 4 old 78’s recorded by my great-GREAT grandfather in the 1920’s. Now there’s a treasure. And another task to be done. *sigh*

Y’know what’s gonna be good? Getting away for a week. VBS at JerseyChick’s church is upcoming soon, and since she let me (wheeee!) do the craft part of it, I’m going to be there to do the craft part of it. From Sunday to Friday, yes I am. And, since I will be away from all the existential noise of my own household, I am anticipating an opportunity to slow down just a touch. Plus play with girls. Not that I won’t miss my boys, I will, very much so, but the change of scenery will be lovely.

Since there’s company coming on Friday, I’ll concentrate on getting the house in order for that- dealing with piles, mainly. I’ll worry about the photos and records and all after I get back from JC’s.

But for now, I’m gonna go buy a maglight- graduation gift for the son of a friend.