Because it really is personal…

Here it is.
I’m a prude. Really. I like long skirts and high necks and I wish everyone else would dress that way, too. I wish people would wait until they were married to have sex, and would tone down their vocabulary, reserving the 4-letter words for important things like dropping hammers on their toes and childbirth. I wish we all went to church and church was a place where a person could go and feel accepted. I am fairly sure there is some kind of contradiction in those previous statements but it’s what I think and I’m sticking to it.

Now that I’ve said that, I know that none of that is going to happen. There will always be people who dress seductively. There always has been and my precious sensibility isn’t going to change that. I do not feel compelled to purchase a megaphone and shout at people I deem imappropriately dressed. I don’t plan on condemning anyone to hell for it, because it’s not my job. I can, however, dress in a manner I consider comfortable and dignified. High necks and long skirts. Yep.

People are going to have sex, to young and too early for my taste. There are many teenagers you simply can’t tell a thing to, and they’re going to go find them a spot and have sex. I know that. I don’t have to like it, I can even voice my desire for it to not be so, but that won’t change things. I can raise my children with my beliefs, but I can’t make them follow them. I can’t monitor their every move, once they turn 16. I just have to trust them and myself, to do what I believe is right.

I can’t censor people’s language. That would be condescending. I can glare at the foul mouthed so-and-so who pollutes the air at Walmart, and having kids has afforded me the opportunity to develop a nuclear-powered glare, very effective at quieting the riotous language common to the sporting goods section. I’ve even offered someone a bar of soap, with which to clean up their lexicon. It was ineffective, but made me feel better. I *can*, however, keep my own language decorous. I do not cuss with the exception of an occasional *SHIT!* when something doesn’t go my way. That is a word I don’t consider anything more than kind of rude. It’s not blasphemous, nor does it evoke the idea of a behavior considered naughty. It’s just stinky and gross. I am deeply uncomfortable with blasphemy, I don’t like the idea of disrespecting God or behaving in a manner that might imply He isn’t wholly sovereign. I do, however, harbor a great respect for creative cursing. Calling someone a slime-laden load from the primeval depths…that’s a good thing. Much nicer thant “you f*@!!*%^ no-good-$#!^!” Really, it’s a matter of using your head. Anyone can cuss.

And yes. I do wish everyone would act like a Christian. It would be alot easier to get along with them if they did. Oh I know give me what-for about all your non-Christian selves, I know I know. But the fact is, if everyone behaved according to a certain set of standards, we’d know what to expect from them. Now, having said that, I don’t attend church. I’d like to but I can’t find one I like. I tried one, and they all stared at me because I wasn’t from around there. I tried another and when they found out I didn’t homeschool my kids you’da thought I’d said I’d sold my children into white sex-slavery. I was dropped like the proverbial hot potato. The third one I signed up to help with some crafty-stuff (totally my thing, I even have referrences), I never got called back. So now I am in limbo. I’d start my own church except…I don’t want to. See, sometimes it seems like the least-Christian acting people are the ones who wear the Christian label. Not all, to be sure, many Christians live their faith and are wonderful to be around. But many wear the label like a shield, and hit you in the face with it whenever you don’t quite fit their concept.

So here I am, Prudence McCalvinox, sister to Agnes. Since I can’t make the world fit my standard, I’ll just fit my own standard and try not to let the world scare me too much.