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So I got everyone out the door by 7am. By 7:05 I’d enthusiastically gobbled down my favorite combination of ‘Meds That Don’t Really Work Because I Take Such Small Doses It Must Be Placebo Effect’ , to paraphrase The Current Dr. H, May Her Head Of Lush Black Hair Be Infested With Dandruff and Split Ends, May She Be Cursed With A Week Of Egregious Eye Boogers.
And, by 7:30, those Meds That Don’t Work had me snuggled in my warm and comfortable bed, in a nest built of pillows and blankets, and last thing I remember is squinting at the clock and noting the time: 7:36 am.
The next thing I remember is cracking open an eye, cognizant of the need to pee, and noting the time: 12:00. I Woke, I Peed, I Went Back to Sleep. At 2:00 I woke up again, feel all warm and fuzzy (I have far, far too strong of a fondness for xanax), and decided I’d better get up, as #4 gets off the bus at 2:30, and I am, in spite of an obvious attraction for certain pharmaceuticals, somewhat responsible.
Now, after throwing an entirely full cup of coffee to the floor, breaking the mug and…do you know what kind of mess it makes when a ceramic mug shatters into a zillion semi-microscopic pieces in a puddle of coffee the size of Rhode Island? A Big one, and hard to clean up, too….anyway, fortunately for my poor nerves, there was more coffee to be had. And more cups. Also fortunately for this overdeveloped sense of guilt, the cup was a $2 find at Target, and not some handmade one of a kind thing with sentimental value. Along with the coffee- I was starving, having not eaten since supper last night (grilled chicken and snow peas, not exactly hearty fare). Peanuts and raisins. Now there’s a combination straight from the fingers of God. Hearty, filling, sweet-and-salty, no cooking required, no thinking required, just dump in a bowl, give a stir and eat. Perfect. And pretty good with a cup of coffee, too.
Fuzziness lingers. When sleep is lost, I have to make up the lost amount. I can’t just go to bed at my normal time and reset the internal workings. If I lose 17 hours sleep, I need 17 extra hours on top of my usual 9 hours/night. So this morning, I got 7 hours. Now I’m only down by 10. So if I get in bed tonight at, say, 7 instead of 9, that’s 2 extra hours and I’m down by 8. I can go back to bed after the kids get to school and sleep until noon…and so on. Until it’s all made up for.
In the mean time, the house just gets messier and messier. SD gets in from England around 9 tomorrow night (I think), and I’d really like for the house to not be something you’d expect Rosanne Barr to be managing. I know, shove everything into baskets and boxes and put them in the game room. He doesn’t go down there much.
And then Saturday, we have to go to Auburn for a Family Reunion and watch Mom be the Sparkling Hostess. And sleep in a hotel, which I can never do. This is ridiculous. Maybe I’ll spend Friday night throwing up and can use that as an excuse to not go.
Sleep is underrated in our society. Here’s this activity that takes up 1/3 of our lives, that is vitally necessary to our sanity, and we treat it like it’s an inconvenience. If you’ve never had your sanity called into question, and been told that sleep is more important to you that food, count your blessings. Never take it for granted, if you are able to lay down and sleep. You are blessed.
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So, the Current Dr. H. saw fit to alter my sleep meds. Fine, I said, I’m game. Maybe I’ll lose weight.
Well I’ll lose weight all right. The stuff she prescribed? A “gentle, soothing” medication, well liked by multitudes? Phphht.
I might has well have taken caffiene with ipecac. I was WIDE AWAKE THE ENTIRE NIGHT, with occasional stomach cramps and constant, low-level nausea. Attach that to 3 hours of sleep the night before, and throw in 2 bouts of fatigue-related hysteria involving tears of frustrations and curses upon the head of The Current Dr. H. I also decided to say PHOOEY on insurance, I’m finding me a doctor who will let me do what WORKS.
So now, I’m exhausted but wide awake, soothing my irritated gut with iced green tea and mumbling instructions to the boys.
I can’t drive. #2 has agreed to take #1 to work, and I promised him a tank of gas in exchange. He and #3 will be tardy for school, but ehn…it’s not like they make a habit of it. One tardy won’t destroy their chances for college.
I think, once everyone’s off to school, I’m going to take one of those sleeping pills I KNOW to work, unplug the phone, and get in bed. Screw the baskets of unfolded laundry and the smelly dog bedding that needs washing. Mom Needs Her Beauty Sleep.