Because it really is personal…

Sweet Daddio’s First English Adventure
April 16, 2007, 1:22 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

Sweet Daddio’s First English Adventure

Dr. H, the Good Dr. H, and Dr. H the Therapist
April 16, 2007, 1:12 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I decided a while back that I needed to find a local psychiatrist. I am very fond of The Good Dr. H, but at 5-1/2 hours drive away, continuing the relationship was becoming arduous. So, I made an appointment at a clinic about an hour from here (why there? They take our insurance. For some reason no psychiatrist close accepts The Worlds Most Common Private Medical Insurance, but an hour beats 5-1/2). A month ago they did ‘intake’ on me, basically a counselor interviewed me to see if I was so bat-shit crazy I needed the doctor NOW, or could I wait a bit. I could wait a bit.

So today I got to see Dr. H. A different one from The Good Dr. H, this one being a female of Middle Eastern descent, very nice, and she (O! JOY!) treated me like I had brains between my ears. She’s changing some of the meds, but that’s ok. It’s like a chef changing a recipe to make it their own. They Must.

The clinic was blissfully quiet, no one muttering and rocking, no odors, no people complaining because they’d been kept waiting. It just me and this short, athletic woman in a shiny silver suit. She was pleasant also, even though through my mind I kept waiting for her to pull out the silver hat with wings on it, and asked to transport to the Mother Ship.

Dr. H requested that I cut back on the booze to 1 drink a week. I said ok, and I guess I will. Maybe. She suggested I cut my consumption in half. Maybe I’ll do that instead. It turns out that a large mitigating factor in my weight gain over the past 8 years could be the sleep meds I’m on. She said each one independantly can cause weight gain, and I’m on 3. So. Cold turkey off those babies, and we’ll see how it goes.

Oo! And therapy, too! twice a month with a counselor, until we get my Issues resolved. Yes, I have issues. For instance, care to guess when the last time I took a meaningful look in the mirror was? 12 years go. I do not look in the mirror. I’ll look at my hair, or my makeup, but never, ever at the whole package, and definitely never a full length mirror. Dr. H. The Therapist (why do they all have to start with H?)tried to work on that in the short time we had remaining, when he found out I don’t look at myself, and gave me instructions to look in the mirror for 10 minutes every day. Yeah right. I’d rather pull off a toenail. So, we’re probably going to do something about that. Who knows, maybe for the first time in my life I won’t feel repulsive when I think about it.

Such nice young men!
April 16, 2007, 4:55 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

My children, they’re either abnormally perceptive or possess a strong sense of self-preservation. Maybe both.

I was not happy last night. In fact, my displeasure with life in all it’s forms was bordering on pathological. Every single thing I encountered, whether it’s a dog dismantling a pinecone on the carpet, or the way a child has worn through the soles of his shoes IN JUST 6 MONTHS (the NERVE!) caused me to grit my teeth and grow claws.

And somehow, teenage boys that they are, they noticed this. Maybe it was the bile I spit on the wall, or the way my head turned slowly 360 degrees around. Dunno, nonetheless, they noticed not all was right in my world. So, they offered (no, they insisted)to send me to bed early, that they’d take care of tieing down the sails and putting their little brother and the dogs in their crates for the night.

And so they did. Everyone was present and accounted for this morning. The doors were all locked, half the dishes were strewn all over the house, crusty with burrito guts and salsa, and the dishwasher full of the same clean dishes frm yesterday, even though I asked and they promised the dishwasher would be emptied and reloaded.

But that’s ok. That’s not really the important thing. The doors were locked and the younger and smaller living creatures had their needs attended to, really that’s all that matters.

They’re going to make stellar husbands one day. Let’s hope they find a mate worthy of them. ( I had to say that. I’m their mother.)


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