Because it really is personal…

Ok. I confess. I like New Age music. It relaxes me and as tense as I normally am, anything that helps without involving chemicals and trips to a psychiatrist is a very good thing. I refuse to listen to Yanni on general principle, but everything else (except maybe Vangelis) is pretty fair game. I have an extensive collection of stuff on the Windham Hill label, because it tends to lean more toward the acoustic, which is my preference, but every now and then I’ll delve into the realm of the more AerieFaerie electronic stuff (ok ok , not Enya, because you’ve heard one, you’ve heard them all).

What cracks me up about New Age music is the rank predictability of the titles. Right now, playing on my computer, is Music Sojourn Ambient Caverns http://musicsojourn.com/Playlists/Ambient_Caverns/
It’s free, unless you want to subscribe to keep from having to endure the occasional spoken word. Here are the names of the last 3 songs played:
Nicholas Gunn (1996) – Universal Being – Crossroads
William Watson (2000) – Garden of Zen – Echoes Living Room Concerts
April Stace (2003) – When It’s Raining – Harp 46

The titles inevitably involve moons, dolphins, weather phenomena, or astronomical events. You never see a New Age piece entitled “Darlene Wears Red boots” or “I sk8 tu U” In defense of New Age title-ists, there is one song by Bill Frisell called “Good Dog, Happy Man”,ok , so they aren’t totally OUT THERE.

The boys make fun of my music. I have several CD’s by Karl Jenkins, where the vocals are a phonic chant sung by Miriam Stockley in a tribal sort of way (she trained in South africa). I like them, and find them incredibly inspiring, especially cranked up loud. My disrespectful children, however, call them “Japanese Godzilla Faerie Music” after the Greek chorus of faeries in one of those appalling Godzilla movies. I suppose, if you’re an ignorant redneck hillbilly adolescent hick, that’s what it would sound like. These are, after all, people who listen to so-called bands named after torture implements and body parts. So who is better, a classically trained vocalist who spent years honing her art all over the world, or a guy named Butt-Ugly who mouth breathes and sports a tattoo of a woman’s cooter on his bicep? i know…it’s all about opinion. Well. I’m the Mother and My Opinion Is Right.

All said and done, I do find the titles of New Age music somewhat silly and predictable. And somehow I doubt the men who perform this stuff have obscene tattoos and personal hygiene issues. No. They all look like Yanni and smell like sandalwood and sage. They’re vegetarians and all touchy feely and in tune with their feminine side. Oh well. I like the music anyway.